Have you had any help regarding her mental health, has anyone been out to talk to her? Maybe there are people or organisations around by you who help deal with teenagers. I hated myself and basically was trying to destroy everything as I didn't feel I deserved it.įor whatever reason she sounds as if she's unhappy about somethign, whether it's current or from the past, as i said it could seem so small, she may not even know why she is so down about herself. I say this as everyone was looking at my behaviour and dealing with that, noone went deeper, no one asked how I felt, did I really feel good about myself, how did I feel about my life, was i happy. Even if you don't want to tell me, please have a think yourself. Has something happened, no matter how small it may seem to you, in her past, say from the age of 3 upwards. Now that im older i've assessed all of that as it appears due to instances in the past, these had affected me and caused me to feel this way, I wasn't aware of this as a teenager, I didn't know why I felt this way. I was very angry with everyone, I had no confidence, I really just felt useless. I was awful as a teenager, I did all this type of stuff, violent (not overly but very aggressive), arguing with everyone in the home, drinking, smoking weed, running away, staying out all night. I did suspect there may have been a catalogue of events going on. If you have'nt received any support I would suggest that you make an appointment with your GP a.s.a.p and go and speak to the gp alone as they can make a refferal to CAMHS these people really know they're stuff and can be a great support to your daughter and the rest of the family.They could be the bridge between you all so it once again becomes a family instead of your daughter on one side and the rest of you on the other and you all desperatly trying to reach one another but remaining out of one anothers grasp. It could be a cry for help.I know that may sound strange but belive me young people have done some very extreme things in the past and unfortunatly probably will still in the future to be noticed to receive help with whatever's bothering them. ![]() ![]() I know teenagers are hard work generally and that they're hormones and changes in the body and brain can attribute alot to the problems surrounding them but when things get this bad there really should be an investigation into why she's behaving like this! With the other problems you've been having with your daughter have you all had any support?Has she been refered to see someone to find out why she's being violent and abusive? Oh Hazel I really feel for you hunni:sadhug.I know it's really raw right now and everyone's obvously really angry but throwing her out is not going to help the situation at all.She's only 14 so still very much a child and that shows in her actions to have sex in your house whilst your down stairs shows someone that's very emotionally young.įirst things first I think you and your daughter need to sit down and have a proper talk together,preferably with no one else in the house.You need to find out if they used contraception if you don't allready know.Make sure also that it was consentual.Ask your daughter about how she feels about the boyfriend and how he feels about her.Tell her that you want her to be able to talk to you about anything,that your there for her and that just because she's older now that you still care about her and worry about her. ![]() Please do not throw her out though, this will only ignite any insecurities she does have or any feelings of being unloved. I think a talk is needed more than a confrontation, understanding why she is behaving this way will help you both a lot in my opinion. I would sit her down & explain why you were concerned she was having sex, all of the risks of the stds, pregnancy, asking her why does she feel she needs to have sex at this age, maybe she is under peer pressure, perhaps she feels bad about herself so she is having sex to make herself feel loved and wanted, believe me this happens, sometimes young girls think that that is love, it's hard to understand at this age. ![]() If it were me I wouldn't be flying off the handle, I just think that gets their back up ( I talk from my own experience of myself). I don't know if other stuff has gone on, im going on based on this post. Personally I feel wanting her gone from the house based on her having sex in her sisters bed is a little harsh.
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